Remember the old song, “Make new friends, but keep the old. One is silver and the other gold”?
I want to debunk the idea that old friends are better than new friends.
Don’t get me wrong… I’ve got a lot of old friends that I love, and I don’t plan on ditching anytime soon. But I have others that I shouldn’t associate with any longer.
Why? You become the average of your ten closest friends.
Do You Want to be Like Your Friends?
Think about that…
Who are your friends and what are their qualities, characteristics, aspirations?
Are the people you hang out with smart or stupid? Educated or uneducated? Motivated or unmotivated? Successful or unsuccessful? Open-minded or close-minded? Peaceful or angry? Happy or sad?
Think of all the qualities your friends possess… Then ask yourself this question:
Are these qualities I want to display?
Do you want to be like your friends…really? Do you aspire to become like them…or like other people you know or would like to know?
Choose Friends Wisely
Now figure out how to hang out with them. Choose your friends and colleagues, so you associate up…toward your aspirations…not down…away from your best self and highest potential.
I’m not saying never to speak to your old friends again…if they aren’t “like” the best self you want to grow into. But I do suggest you don’t spend as much time with them.
Instead, spend more time with people who inspire you to be like them…and help you do so.
Change Your Friends
If the people who comprise your circle of friends right now do not embody who you want to become, you need to change your circle of friends.
I hate to say it… I know it sounds cruel and cold. It’s a bit self-serving…
But if you want to be your best self, you need to surround yourself with people who embody those qualities. You want to spend your time with those who mirror that back to you and who can teach you how to be your best self.
To make that happen, take the following steps:
- Make a list of the characteristics you would like to embody. What would your best self be like? Who would you be? What characteristics would you have? Maybe you want to be like Richard Branson or Tony Robbins, for example.
- Seek out people who possess those characteristics. For instance, you can go to events, meetings, and seminars that those types of people attend. For example, I go to personal development seminars. Some of my best friends are those I’ve met through the Certified High Performance Coaching program; we all aspire the same thing, we want to be high performers in every area of our lives, and we want to help other people do the same.
- Jot down notes about where you can find these people. Where can you meet them? Create a plan to do so.
- Schedule time in your calendar to find these new friends.
Keep Some Old Friends
You’re probably thinking, “What about my old friendships? Do I just say, ‘Hey, I don’t want to be like you, so I’m out of here’?”
No. You kindly and lovingly opt out of these relationships or see these people less often.
I realize that you may have to associate with people who are not good role models for you. You can’t easily opt out of all relationships.
But you can opt to spend enough time with other people who feed you the energy, and the information, and the support, and the knowledge that you need to grow into the person you need to be to achieve your potential.
Level up your friends and colleagues so you level up yourself. Be with people who serve as strong role models for you.
If you take this action to heart, you will find yourself achieving much more inspired results in all areas of your life. You’ll move forward faster than you thought possible.
Are you the average of your ten best friends?
If you are interested in getting clear about how to level up in every area of your life—including who you hang out with, apply for a free one-hour high-performance strategy session. (Click here to download the application.) Fill it out, and then attach it to an email and send it to Nina@Ninaamir.com.
PLUS, for a brief time, I’m giving away two bonuses to those who sign up for my 12-week Certified High Performance Coaching program: a bonus session (value $300) and a ticket to Brendon Burchard’s High Performance Academy (value $997) this March in San Diego.
Make 2017 the year you accomplish more in 3 months than you you did in the last 12.
Photo copyright: Alexas_Fotos / Pixabay.com