Most of us don’t realize how often we say we can’t do something. But what could we accomplish if we stopped saying, “I can’t”? Any limiting thought or belief holds us back., and it’s highly likely that in most, if not all, cases when when we say these words they are based in a belief or thought and not in reality.
From Where do Your Limiting Beliefs Stem?
When you were a child, you probably had many dreams about what you would be when you grew up. Have they come true? Or did you put them aside at some point?
Did you decide not to pursue your dreams because something made you believe you were unable to make them come true? Were you labeled in some way that made you feel or think you didn’t have the ability to do what you desired or create what you wanted?
Most of us have limiting beliefs that stand in the way of us accomplishing goals and living to our fullest potential. Realizing where they came from can help us dispel them. Do you know from where your limiting beliefs stem?
For example, when I was young I said I wanted to become a novelist. My mother told me “only really good writers can make a living as novelists.” I took that to mean I was not a good enough writer, and I became a magazine journalist instead. Later I became a nonfiction book editor, a blogger and a nonfiction author. Although I have one manuscript for a novel, I’ve never pursued that dream.
I know a male dancer who says he’s too short to perform in most ballet companies. The label “short” stops him from even trying. I’ve pointed out to him that I’ve seen a quite a number of phenomenal male dancers who were below average in height, but he won’t listen to me. Instead, he chooses to recall the words of a ballet teacher who told him he’d never have a career as a professional dancer because of his height.
Don’t Let Labels Define You or Your Goals
Here are three different types of stories:
#1
This week a friend told me about a dancer who was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis and told she would only be able to dance for three more years (if she was lucky). It has been nine and she continues to dance daily. She didn’t let her diagnosis, or the label of having MS, stop her from pursuing her dream.
#2
I know a woman who was diagnosed at an early age with cerebral palsy. Despite being placed in special education classes, she managed to graduate from college with honors. Now in an adult, she claims to be cured and to have no issues related to her so-called condition. She says most of her life she didn’t realize she had CP and, therefore, she didn’t let it stop her or affect her beliefs about her self or her abilities.
#3
Just prior to writing this I also discovered the video below. Tim’s story inspired this post:
Did you notice anything interesting? Tim has Down’s Syndrome. Yet, he managed to pursue his dream of opening his own restaurant, a dream he’s had since childhood. He didn’t let a disability stop him. He actually feels that disability makes him special. And now he dances his way to work each day and hugs each person who enters his restaurant. Why? He’s living his dream. He didn’t say, “I can’t.”
Neither did the two women I mentioned above.
Get the Help You Need
The other thing I loved about Tim’s story was that he got support for his dream. His brother and his father both help him in his business.
Sometimes we can’t fulfill our potential, realize our dream or achieve our goals by ourselves. If we do, indeed, have disabilities or weaknesses (and we all do…), we need to recognize them and ask for assistance. In this way we can stop saying, “I can’t,” and start saying, “I can,” or at least, “I’ll find a way.”
Weakness doesn’t have to be a bad thing. It can make you special. And knowing your weaknesses and how to ask for the help you need makes you strong and helps you succeed.
Once you’ve watched the video I shared above, I think it becomes pretty hard to continue saying, “I can’t.” When you replace those words with “I can” a new world full of possibilities and potential opens up to you.
What dreams or goals have you left behind by saying, “I can’t,” and could you now achieve them by having an “I-can” attitude?
Photo courtesy of iqoncept | stockfresh.com
