The best way to achieve transformation is to “be” the person you most desire to become. Embody the new identity…fully. That’s when your mindset and habits align with your identity. You change. Also, people sense who you are from your posture, actions, speech, and energy. I have written and spoken about embodying an identity quite […]
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“Don’t bring your old self into the new year.” You’ve probably heard that advice. However, you may not understand why doing so is imperative for achieving your goals this year. You also might not have any idea how to leave your old self behind—or create a new one. Let’s keep this simple… The person you
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With the new year fast approaching, change is on my mind—and probably on your mind, too. Of course, I desire change for my country and the world. However, I also want personal change. I have goals I want to achieve in the next 12 months, and accomplishing them requires that I change. Yet, it’s difficult
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Our lives exist at the intersection of all our identities, passions, skills, relationships, interests, careers, and hobbies. Trying to present only one aspect of yourself to the world denies others the opportunity to know all facets of who you are. If you are like me, you might be described as a multi-talented, multi-interested, or multi-passionate
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Americans celebrated the Thanksgiving holiday this past week. For many people, this day revolves around cooking a huge turkey dinner and eating it with friends and family; it has no deep meaning. For others, the holiday is a time of reflection and a chance to express gratitude to those they love and appreciate—and even to
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Every time you complain, you damage your brain. This type of negative talk activates the amygdala, which floods your body with hormones that shrink the hippocampus and strengthen neural pathways for fear and stress. In fact, complaining rewires your brain in the same way as experiencing a traumatic event. Your focus on and talk about
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Being ghosted can feel like a challenging mix of rejection, abandonment, and grief. You don’t just lose the person—you lose the closure on the relationship. Healing from that requires both understanding and self-compassion. Here are seven effective and practical ways to approach your post-being-ghosted healing journey: 1. Acknowledge What Happened—Without Blame In her book Loving
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Don’t think you’re crazy if you feel upset about being ghosted. Ghosting—when someone suddenly cuts off all communication without explanation—tends to stir up intense feelings, even if the relationship wasn’t long or especially close. In fact, the distress this experience causes is tied to several well-documented psychological mechanisms. Ghosting isn’t painful because of the silence alone.
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Do you engage in critical self-talk, unhealthy habits, addictions, or even refusal to go after your dreams? Anytime you engage in behaviors directed at yourself that are counter-productive, hurtful, or even abusive, you punish yourself. Maybe you tend to punish yourself with negative self-talk. You tell yourself things like: “I’m stupid.” “I’m ugly.” “I’m unlovable.”
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Do you punish yourself? You may not even realize you do so. But if you are your own harshest critic, you likely engage in self-punishment. Self-punishment shows up as demeaning self-talk, negative thoughts about yourself, self-blame, and repetitive stories about your failures, faults, or mistakes. It also can involve overeating, addictions, or a lack of
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Fear is a natural and instinctual brain-based response designed to protect you from physical harm, like the attack of a mountain lion. Unfortunately, the brain also perceives any change as a physical threat—even a different haircut, a new habit, or an investment in a personal growth program. That’s when fear becomes a barrier preventing you
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Sometimes you voice a desire, but when it is delivered, you want to exchange or return it. Or you want to reject the fulfilled desire, because it arrived at what you deem an “inopportune” time. And then there are instances when you don’t realize you’ve voiced a desire, and yet it is delivered to your
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Change the World One Book at a Time: How to Make a Positive and Meaningful Difference with Your Words, will teach those who want to write for change how to produce books that serve as potent tools for transformation.
