Monday Inspiration: Heal Old Relationships

Unhealed relationships make nasty open wounds. Stitch them, staple them, do whatever you have to do…just find a way to close them.

Yes, you’ll be left with a scar—that’s OK—better to have the scar then to have the open wound.

Open emotional wounds are dangerous. They make you vulnerable to infections of negativity, and negativity can poison everything we touch with our hearts and minds.

What’s so interesting is we all actually want closure. We want to mend those broken relationships, but few of us ever do.

The Question is Why?

Because we are afraid.

Fear is a powerful voice inside that inhibits us from doing oh-so-many amazing things, including mending broken relationships.

I know all about that fear—I felt it this past weekend while I was attending a wedding. There were people at that ceremony I haven’t seen in many years, people with whom I had some deep, outstanding issues.

Before arriving at the wedding, I had to think about how I was going to deal with those people (and those tarnished relationships) head-on. In doing so, I came up with some really great ideas from which everyone looking to heal a relationship can benefit.

5 Ideas for Healing Wounded Relationships

Journal

This isn’t for them, this is for you.

This is your moment, your space, your medium to express how you truly feel with zero-risk of repercussion. That means there’s nothing to fear.

Get your feelings out, and let the expression of those feelings carry you to a place of love, acceptance, and forgiveness.

Write a Letter

Address it to the friend or family member with whom you’ve had a falling out.

I don’t suggest you send it (though you can if you want). Just use the letter-writing experience as a device for voicing your feelings.

Write several letters—an angry one, a forgiving one, a happy one—using each individual note to capture a different element of emotion.

If you like, send the final one—the one with no anger, blame or judgement.

Have a Conversation

If you’re not the writing type, you should feel comfortable in approaching the person or persons who make up the other side of your wounded relationship.

Kick off the conversation with something that’s both simple and accurately reflective of how you feel.

Here’s what I like to use:

“I don’t feel complete with this relationship. It still bothers me, and I would like to talk about it. We don’t have to rehash the past, but I’d like to have a conversation with you so we can move past this.”

Try Counseling

Sometimes it takes a professional to bring closure to your wounds, so don’t be shy about seeking the aid of a counselor.

Go on your own or—if it’s appropriate—invite the person or persons you’re trying to reconcile with along too.

Let Go, Let God

When it doubt, give it up to God.

Just say, “Lord, this is incomplete, but I want to complete it. Please, God, give me the strength to forgive, heal this, and move on with my life.”

Don’t be afraid to use faith, it may be your most powerful tool.

You need to close the door on anything incomplete in your life for new and better doors to open. Try using one of these five strategies to go out there and close some doors by healing wounded relationships. That’s your challenge for the day, and I hope you feel inspired enough to carry it out.

How have you healed your old relationship wounds?

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