Most people seek results by influencing others. Yet, the true power lies in influencing yourself. Do that, and you’ll get powerful results quickly and easily.
When I offer Certified High Performance Coaching to clients, we spend at least two of the 12 sessions focused on influence, which includes the art of persuasion. However, when I ask the person I’m coaching, “Who do you need to influence most,” they often respond, “Myself.”
They realize that the only thing standing in the way of achieving their desired results is themselves. Yet, they feel challenged to make the necessary changes required to succeed. They find it difficult to influence or persuade themselves to develop new habits or mindsets that help them get results.
That’s an essential awareness.
Until you learn to influence yourself, you will keep doing what you’ve done in the past. And if you continue doing it the way you always have, you’ll continue getting the same results you’ve gotten to date.
To get new results, you need to change. And to get yourself to change, you need to influence yourself to do so.
External Influences Bombard You
You are bombarded daily by a myriad of external influences, such as social media posts, the opinions of friends and family, news, and email. It’s easy to forget that the most powerful influence comes from within.
Self-influence harnesses your personal freedom and power to guide your decisions, shape your mindset, and ultimately lead you to action that gets results. It transforms your thoughts and beliefs into sources of motivation and empowerment. Ultimately, you become someone able to get desired results.
Let’s explore the difference between influencing yourself and others, since this is the key to mastering personal growth and getting powerful results.
Influencing Yourself vs. Influencing Others
Self-influence refers to the internal process of motivating yourself to take action. The action could be choosing different thoughts, developing new habits, like changing your diet or exercise routine, applying for a job, or leaving a marriage. It might involve choosing a new identity, developing more self-discipline, or upping your commitment to an activity or goal.
Ultimately, self-influence means persuading yourself to do something—usually something you don’t want to do, are afraid to do or seem unable to do.
Influencing others is the act of guiding or persuading individuals or groups to adopt ideas, change perspectives, or take new action. To do this, you must learn how to communicate persuasively and effectively, build trust and respect in your relationships, and understand social dynamics and what inspires and motivates people.
There are a few clear distinctions between influencing yourself versus influencing others. For instance, the former is an internal action, while the latter is an external action. Also, you are solely responsible for influencing yourself. Influencing someone else requires communication with them in a manner that makes them want to change or act.
Foundations for Self-Influence
To influence yourself, first, you must recognize that you need to persuade yourself to act. If you can’t do that, you won’t get different results. This necessitates developing an awareness of your weaknesses or inability to act in certain life arenas.
Understanding your motivations also helps. When you know what drives you to act or make meaningful change, you can draw on your “why” to influence yourself. It can also prove helpful to understand why you don’t act or change in ways that help you get the results you seek.
Putting these foundations in place requires self-reflection and personal growth. Therefore, you might need to influence yourself to regularly evaluate your thoughts and behaviors, which helps identify areas for improvement and the need for self-influence.
Here are a few tips to help you do this:
- Set aside regular time for journaling or meditation.
- List the areas of your life where you feel stuck.
- Journal about what stops you from taking action. Why don’t you create what matters to you?
- Ask, “Why do I want to do this or get this result?” “What becomes possible if I take action?”
- Ask yourself probing questions like “What do I truly want?” “What beliefs limit me?” or “Why is this result important to me?”
- Use these insights to determine how to influence yourself.
The Power of Self-Influence
When you influence yourself, you recognize and harness the power of your thoughts and feelings. You take control of yourself and stop allowing your mental chatter to dictate what you do or don’t do—and the results you get or don’t get.
When you master self-influence, you become the captain of your ship. You steer the vessel rather than letting the currents of life, your emotional state, or your negative thinking determine your course. As a result, you cultivate resilience, boost your confidence, and align your actions with what matters to you. And you’ll get powerful results.
3 Tools to Help Influence Yourself
Try these three time-tested tools to develop the ability to influence yourself and get desired results.
1. Affirmations
Affirmations are simple and effective tools for self-influence. You repeat these short, powerful statements to yourself and reprogram your brain for positive beliefs. As a result, they influence how you feel about yourself and your ability to take actions that produce desired results.
They also stop the constant stream of negative thoughts you have on repeat that prevent you from achieving the results you want. For example, if you struggle with self-doubt, an affirmation like “I am capable and can do it” can help rewire your brain. It’s definitely a better thing to say to yourself than, “I can’t do it and will never succeed.”
2. Visualization
Top athletes, performers, and successful individuals worldwide use visualization to create powerful results. By imagining yourself taking successful action, you create a mental blueprint that influences your actions and, therefore, your outcomes. In fact, you change your neural pathways so they support your efforts to achieve goals.
This practice reinforces your belief in your capabilities and prepares your mind for success. It persuades you that whatever you want to do is possible. In the process, it convinces your brain of the same thing, which makes acting easier.
3. Environment
While self-influence is about internal change, creating an external environment that fosters your growth is essential. Surround yourself with positive influences—people, resources, and experiences that uplift and inspire you.
For example, if you want to influence yourself to stop eating ice cream, don’t buy ice cream or have it in the freezer. If you want to exercise daily, allot time for this activity, watch exercise videos, or hire a personal trainer.
The Most Powerful Way to Influence Yourself
The most powerful way to influence yourself involves changing your identity. Decide to be someone who does whatever is necessary to achieve the results you seek. Take on the characteristics, mindset, and habits of someone who would get the results you desire. Be that person now.
For instance, if publishing a book is your desired result, be a writer. Better yet, be a published writer. What mindset or habits would that person have? Adopt that mindset and those habits, and you will get the results you want. You won’t need to influence yourself because you will naturally do these things.
Why? Because it is who you are. You are someone who has the mindset and habits that get the results you desire.
The key, therefore, is to influence yourself to change who you are being. Let’s say you want to influence yourself to get up early each morning. Choose to be an early riser. What does an early riser do? Go to bed early, set the alarm for 6 a.m., and get out of bed when the alarm rings.
An early riser also tells themself, “I am an early riser.” And they don’t ever question if they will get up early. There is no need for a debate or a decision. The decision was already made when they chose to be an early riser. Therefore, they get up early consistently.
So, your first point of influence is with yourself, but it’s about deciding who to be. You’ll have little need to influence yourself after that unless it is in a different area of life or to obtain a new result.
Self-Influence is a Journey
Influencing yourself is an ongoing journey of discovery and growth. It requires that you cultivate the mindset and habits that support your aspirations. Remember, the most profound influence comes from within. And self-influence is the most effective way to get powerful results.
Are you good at influencing yourself? Tell me in a comment below. (If you are not, please reach out. We can schedule a brief chat. And please share this post with someone who might benefit from reading it.
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