On Monday I took my two children, aged 12 and 14, off to camp for a four-week stay. They go to camp every year, but this is the first time they have attended for more than three weeks. My son was so excited; camp is the highlight of his year. My daughter was less excited; she’s at that age when camp is no longer such a thrill (unless, like her brother, you live for camp) and she left a boyfriend behind, which made her very sad. My husband and I said goodbye to them with a mix of melancholy and joy. We always miss them and worry about them, but we are so thrilled to have a break and to get some time to ourselves. We always say, “We all need a break from each other.”
Since my husband goes off to work early and returns late, I have the whole day to myself when they are gone. I decided to treat myself each morning to spiritual time. First, I sit in my bedroom and read an inspiring book and a little of the Sefer Yetzirah (The Book of Creation). Then I write “morning pages” in my journal. Then I make tea and go upstairs to my meditation room, where I read a little of the Zohar, the most important Kabbalistic text written by Shimon Bar Yochai, a little of The Course in Miracles, and a page or two from Kabbalah 365. Then, I do Wayne Dosick’s 20 Minute Kabbalah practice, which involves a time for meditation or prayer, and then I finish up by pulling a Tarot card and two Kabbalah cards (from different decks). I write down the meaning of these (intuited or from a book) and then write a little about them in another journal.
(Unfortunately, I will not be able to continue this full process after these four weeks, since it has been taking me at least an hour and 45 minutes to complete, and I normally don’t have that much time in the morning. During this time I will at least get me in the habit, and I can then pick and choose what I do each day, incorporating as many elements as time allows. I will, unfortunately, also miss one week while I am at the Aleph Kallah, but I plan to incorporate at least the morning pages and the 20 Minute Kabblah practice into my schedule there.)
I have to say that this time during the last two mornings has been so enjoyable and refreshing and rejuvenating, that I don’t want to do much the rest of the day! I just want to continue reading and meditating and chanting.
Today I really lucked out. A tree feel on some electrical wires not far from my house, which caused the electricity to go out. (That might not seem lucky, but keep reading…) In fact, the electricity has been out all day. So, I actually completed my morning with an hour long walk. It was perfect. I could do this easily every day, and I would probably actually get some real work done afterwards if I was simply writing my own books rather than feeling pressed to edit for clients, write queries to magazines, handle emails, prepare and schedule talks and workshops, etc. (I’d be inspired and in the flow for my own creative work, but I sometimes find that I’m less inspired or motivated to do things I “have” to do.) When I returned from the walk, I read and ate lunch in the sun on the deck with my two cats for company. I would have loved to then go into the garden, or continue reading, or meditate again…
Isn’t that the thing that stops so many of us from having a regular spiritual practice each morning? The fear that then that is all we will want to do – be spiritual? I know I’ve always been afraid that if I spent too much time meditating and doing spiritual rituals and praying and the like, I’d want to be like one of those hermits or gurus who just sits at the top of a mountain or in a cave communing with God. What would happen to my life? It would fall apart.
That’s the reason most of us don’t pursue really, truly having a spiritual experience. We’re too afraid of how the experience will change us and our lives. But it doesn’t have to be that way.
Jesus said it best; the goal is to “be in the world but not of it.” We must have the experience of our own other-worldly-ness and of God but bring that knowledge into this physical world to help us live in it more fully. We must all remember that we are “spiritual beings having a human experience” (Anyone know who said that?) not human beings having a spiritual experience. We must remember who we are and then bring that into the mundane, every day-ness of our lives.
Both yesterday and today I received a messages pertaining to this idea. On Tuesday it was during the meditation that is part of my 20 Minute Kabbalah practice and today it was afterwards when I pulled a Kabbalah card. Both times I was told to reconnect with the spiritual dimension – with God – continually during the day.
Today, before my walk, I also treated myself to a phone session with a dowser. (Yes, they not only find water but clear energy and do healing work – even by phone.) I wanted to clear some blocks I felt I had concerning my work and my health. Interestingly, he reiterated this same point before we hung up. He told me that during the day I could spend 15 seconds thinking about him, thereby tapping back into his energy. He sees himself as a conduit for this energy – be it Divine energy or healing energy or whatever type of energy you want to call it. So, I see his message as similar to the others: Don’t let the whole day go by without connecting and reconnecting to the spiritual dimension and to God. Don’t forget that you are part of that dimension even as you exist on this physical plane. Remember that you are a spiritual being having a human experience. Don’t lose your connection to God and the Divine flow of energy and goodness.
I’ll be looking forward to the morning…and reconnecting a little bit here and there until the dawn comes.