I’ve been suffering from all sorts of medical ailments, which are mostly related to perimenopause. Dry eye. Weight gain. Migraine headaches. Aches and pains. It was the constant headaches – basically every day – that sent me to the doctor, however. Although she agreed that most of my problems came from age – nice to hear – and the changes through which my body was going, she said they could also be stress related or at stress aggravated. She felt the muscles in my shoulders, neck and head and said, “Go to a massage therapist every week. And have some fun.”
I had just finished telling her how the most fun I had every day was eating the great dinners I cook. I know I overeat to compensate for the fact that, sadly, eating is my most enjoyable activity each day. If I can’t do something for myself during the day, I figure I can at least eat what I like…and enough to feel really full and satisfied. I know that’s not only unhealthy but not true happiness either.
Sad to think that I might not be happy. Or am I? How often do I do things that make me smile or laugh? How often am I carefree, spontaneous, and feeling really good? Not too often.
Anyone who has ever watched the DVD or read the book The Secret or has listened to or read the teachings of Abraham as channeled by Esther Hicks knows that for the so-called secret – combining thoughts of what we want with feelings of already having it – to work, we must feel good. Abraham explains why: When we feel good, we vibrate at a frequency that allows in what we want. This is the Law of Allowing. In order to receive what we want, we must, therefore, feel good. We must be happy.
Uh, oh…maybe that’s why I’m not manifesting all my desires.
The Kabbalists say something quite similar. They say that as long as we are focused on what we want, which is an affirmation of lack, we are unhappy and aren’t allowing ourselves to receive what we want. We also are never satisfied with what we receive. We could ask for and receive a million dollars and then immediately want two million dollars. Thus, we are unhappy much of the time and die with 50% of our desires unfulfilled.
The main thing that stops us from being happy – and therefore receiving – is the unhappiness that we have because we feel separate from God. The Kabbalah Center calls this “bread of shame,” but I hate that term. It doesn’t sit right with me. The wife of Rabbi Ashlag calls it the “suffering of separation.” I like that better and it resonates as true. What she means is this: We suffer as long as we see ourselves as separate from God, because what we want it to be one with the Creator.
(This goes back to my last blog where I talked about the separation caused by God giving and us receiving. As long as there is a giver and a receiver, we are two individual entities. We are the receivers and God is the Giver. We have to learn to give unconditionally – to receive only to give – in order to act and be like God, thus causing us to feel and remember our oneness, our unity with God. Then we are happy. Then we receive all of God’s goodness.)
So, our work lies in finding ways to feel our oneness with God. The kabbalists would say, transform your consciousness. That new consciousness should be your primary desire. What is this consciousness? To give unconditionally. To receive only to give. Then we behave in a God-like manner…we become the giver and in the process we receive. What do we receive? Happiness. And with that happiness, we open ourselves to receive the constant flow of goodness from God. All our wishes are granted. All our dreams become manifest.
That’s the real secret – or maybe just the next level, the next phase that no one’s talking about.
It would be easier, I think, to go out dancing, see a comedic movie tak a walk in the woods. I’ll try both…to do things that make me happy and to change my nature to one of receiving to give. I’ll keep you posted on my progress.