How to Use Disappointment to Motivate New Action

Disappointment doesn't have to stop you from going for your dreams

Disappointment is inevitable. Maybe that’s a negative belief, but you’d probably agree that most people experience disappointment at some point—especially if they take risky steps to realize their dreams. But you don’t have to allow disappointment to stop you from continuing to move boldly toward your future vision.

I know this well. As a writer, I boldly send query letters to agents and publishers concerning the book projects I intend them to help me publish. And when I get rejection letters in return, I feel disappointed. As I read their emails, my dream of having my words make a positive and meaningful difference in readers’ lives seems dashed.

It would be easy to allow disappointment to stop me from taking new action or expecting a different result if I dared to try again. But that would mean giving up on my dream…and myself.

Avoid Disappointment by Not Having Expectations

Someone once told me he would never expect desired results again; he’d been disappointed too often. And so, he decided he would simply expect disappointment.

But that’s a broken strategy that only yields more disappointment. After all, your thoughts are creative. If you think you will experience disappointment, you will. And if you expect to be disappointed, you will be.

It’s better to develop an “overcome-disappointment” strategy that works.

10 Strategies that Motivate New Action

So, what can you do when you experience disappointment? Try these 10 strategies to help you continue moving toward your dreams.

1. Acknowledge your disappointment.

It’s never good to ignore emotions. Instead, acknowledge how you feel—disappointed. Then, allow yourself to feel the disappointment and any accompanying emotions, like frustration, anger, sadness, or despair.

However, create a boundary around how long you let yourself wallow in your emotions. Give yourself an hour or a day to really feel them. Then, it’s time to wipe away the tears, raise your energy, and get moving.

2. Pat yourself on the back for trying.

Celebrate that you put yourself out there and tried to create your dream or achieve your goal. Lots of people wouldn’t even try, but you did! That’s worth a pat or two on the back.

Do something nice for yourself. Go out to dinner, buy a new book you’ve wanted to read, or soak in the tub. Celebrate that you took action—even if the result wasn’t what you desired.

3. Determine what you can do next.

You took a step (that didn’t work out as expected). What’s your next step?

Maybe the next step requires repeating the same one you took previously, or maybe you need a new approach. If so, discern what step aligns with that plan.

4. Do the next thing.

Now…take that step. Don’t wait. Do it fast! Move!

The longer you wait, the harder it will become to get moving.

Take some action! Put your intention into the world courageously and with positive energy.

5. Affirm that your results can and will be different.

It’s essential to affirm that you can and will get different results when you take repeated or new actions. Otherwise, you can get stuck in negative thoughts and beliefs.

Or you might repeat what happened in your mind…like an audiobook on automatic replay. Doing so can lead to a powerful negative story about who you are, what you deserve or are worthy of creating, and the outcomes you will get in the future.

Choose the story you tell yourself. Craft one about what a powerful creator you are and how you are tenacious, courageous, and successful.

6. Know everything is happening for you—not to you.

No matter your results, if you know everything is happening for you, not to you, you can rise up from disappointment.

In fact, a belief that everything is happening for your highest good eliminates feeling disappointed. After all, if this is true, then something better is coming your way. Thus, there is no reason to feel disappointed.

7. Course correct as necessary.

Disappointment provides an opportunity to consider how you need to alter your plan to achieve your dreams or goals. It’s a chance to course correct, if your current course is not getting you where you want to go.

Trim tab. Choose a new path. Tweak.

Then, move forward.

8. Learn from your experience.

You can learn a lesson from any experience you have. In fact, you are here in this lifetime to learn, grow, and evolve.

When you experience disappointment, ask what you need to learn from the experience or your results. Search for lessons in your outcomes.

Learn from it all; then, apply what you learn. Try again from your new place of understanding.

9. Ask for advice or help.

When things don’t go as you’d like, it can be difficult to discern your part in the outcome. That’s when asking for advice or help comes in handy.

A good friend, coach, or mentor can help you see into your blind spots. Outside observers can offer insights on how to try again. They can point out what is working and what isn’t, helping you gain more perspective. They might even provide new strategies you can try.

These people can also help you acknowledge your success. You are likely only seeing the failure, which keeps you from taking more action. Their observance of what worked or got you closer to success provides the impetus to help you confidently move forward.

10. Don’t give up.

Whatever you do, don’t let disappointment cause you to give up on your goal or dream. Be tenacious. Be determined.

You are a powerful creator. Put all your energy and focus into achieving your goal or realizing your dream, and you will achieve the result you desire.

Also, when you refuse to give up, you tell the Universe or Source you are serious about creating your desire. That’s when all the forces conspire on your behalf to make your dream a reality.

Also, you rewire your brain every time you recommit and take action. You create neural pathways for determination, tenacity, positivity, commitment, and your desired result.

Don’t Let Disappointment Put a Damper on Your Dream

Disappointment can put a damper on your dream. It can make you feel unworthy, not good enough, and like a failure. It can rip away your self-confidence and courage.

Unless you don’t let that happen.

Instead of expecting a specific result, intend to achieve it. Let your intention energetically propel you toward that outcome like an arrow flying toward a bullseye.

And know that each time you pick yourself up and keep moving forward—despite disappointment—you demonstrate your commitment. And commitment always results in desired outcomes.

How do you overcome disappointment and take new action? Tell me in a comment below. And, please share this post with someone who might benefit from reading it.

What if you could learn to overcome life’s disappointments or develop new habits and mindsets that help you move toward your goals and realize your dreams? That would change your life and results, would it not? If you want to be someone who can do the things necessary to create what matters to you, click here and schedule a quick meeting with me. Let’s see if we are a good fit to work together and what type of coaching would best help you get the results you desire. I can serve as your transformational coach or Certified High Performance Coach.


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